2001-07-29
If I thught I was tired yesterday, today I am completely exhausted. I feel like a zombie just bouncing around the house. I'm counting the minutes until Chloe goes to bed so I can study again. That's the only thing I know right now. The only thing to do that matters. Study. Learn. Memorize.
I took Chloe and the dog to the lake today. We walked through the trails and totally enjoyed eachother. I breathed the green and freshness. I revelled in the break.
He still hasn't spoken to me. We haven't spoken since Friday afternoon. I have no idea what the deal is. I've invited him everywhere I've gone. I've asked him many questions. I get one word answers and usually it's NO. All I have to say is, if you have a problem, talk to me on Friday because until then, I don't have time.
That's about all. I'm feeling lost and tired and weary. But, it will all go away. I'm really proud of myself. I have never had the perseverence or commitment or focus to study this much in my life. I amaze myself by the hour right now, I had no idea what I am capable of. Being proud of me is a very good feeling. I don't even care that he doesn't support me when I struggle like this. I support me when I struggle like this. If feels good. I love me.
